


I Saw My Mom Kissing Santa Claus!

by AnotherCrazyFangirl



Series: 12 Days of Dethmas 2020 [4]
Category: Metalocalypse (Cartoon)
Genre: Charlie just wanted a kissy, Christmas Fluff, M/M, Toki is a nosy nancy and a restless ruth, it's christmas morning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:07:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28095141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherCrazyFangirl/pseuds/AnotherCrazyFangirl
Summary: Toki's too impatient to wait for everyone to come see if Santa Claus had come.He wasn't expecting to see his band mom feeling up Santa Claus.
Relationships: Charles Foster Offdensen/Original Male Character(s)
Series: 12 Days of Dethmas 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2055411
Kudos: 4





	I Saw My Mom Kissing Santa Claus!

**Author's Note:**

> Dec 15th: Crossover With Your Favorite Holiday Song

Toki bounded down the hall of Mordhaus. It was early. Too early. No one was up. All the Klokateers were sleeping. They wouldn't have to be up for another hour or so. 

But Toki just had to see if Santa Claus had come during the night. 

He came to a sliding halt before the door to the living room where the massive tree was waiting. His heart was racing as he put a hand on the doorknob. 

"-go before Toki sees you." 

He stopped. That was Akita's voice. It was undeniable. 

"He's not gonna see us. He should be in bed still. Like we should be." 

Now that voice he couldn't recognize. It was muffled, amusement dripping from his words. 

Toki took a risk and cracked the door, careful not to let it creak. There was Akita, illuminated by the fire roaring cheerfully in the fireplace. He was laughing, hiding his smile behind his hand. A white gloved hand was outstretched. Akita's smile widened and slid his hand into the glove. He was pulled tight against a red and white clad chest. 

Toki opened the door a little bit more and gasped. He quickly covered his mouth and hid behind the closed door. Akita, his band mom, Offdensen's fricking BOYFRIEND, was pressed up against Santa Claus. 

THE Santa Claus. 

He peeked out again. Akita had his arms around Santa's neck, a softer smile on his face. Santa came up to his shoulder, the cap giving him an extra inch. Santa had both arms wrapped around Akita's middle. 

Toki looked up at the ceiling and his eyes widened. A bundle of mistletoe hung over their heads, probably left over from the Christmas party. Santa Claus squeezed Akita's middle and gave a wink over his spectacles. Akita chuckled and bent down, cupping Santa's chin from under his beard. 

Toki closed his eyes but it proved useless. The image of Akita kissing Santa Claus had seared into his brain and he couldn't believe it. 

Akita was cheating on Offdensen with the most beloved holiday icon known to man. 

His mind was reeling. He would have to tell Offdensen. Definitely. It might crush the short business man but it was better to tell him. He was shit at keeping secrets after all. And the band. He would definitely have to tell the band. 

A soft giggle brought him back to earth. Akita flicked Santa between the eyes, a fond smile on his face. "Do you feel proud of yourself?" 

Santa chuckled and Toki tilted his head. It didn't sound like the full belly laugh that was usually associated with the Kringle. 

He leaned on the door to get a better look at Santa and it made a loud creak. Akita and Santa both turned to the opening and Toki hightailed it back to his room. 

"...I think we're both in trouble now." Akita groaned, rubbing his face. Charles let out a laugh, wrapping an arm around the troubled blonde. "It'll provide a lot of laughs." 

\------------------

Toki pouted, stomping his foot in front of the band. "But I ams tellings the truth! I saw Akitas kissing Santa Claus!" 

Nathan rolled his eyes. "Toki, Akita would never cheat on Offdensen. He gets too spoiled to just throw it away for an imaginary man." 

Toki pulled on his hair. "But I dids!"

Murderface rubbed his chin. "He could be right. Offdenschen isch pretty damn boring. I'd cheat on him too if I were in a homo relationschip with him." 

Skwisgaar nodded. "Offdensen ams too goods for hims anyway." 

"You're only saying that cause Akita's Finnish. He's way too good for Offdensen." Nathan grumbled. 

"Boys, what's going on?" The five of them stiffened, caught mid huddle arguing over who was out of who's league. None of them bothered looking back at their manager and they started to argue quietly about who should tell him. The discussion about whether or not Akita had been unfaithful had gone through the window. Now, it was a discussion about who would tell Offdensen about his boyfriend kissing another man. 

Toki was eventually shoved in front of Offdensen who was waiting expectantly with his arms crossed. "U-Uh, I gots sometings to tell yous, Offdensens..." 

Charles cocked an eyebrow. "Okay. I'm listening." 

Toki shifted in place, eyes on the ground. "IsawsAkitaskissingSantasClauslastnightsbutpleasedonotsbemadsathimandtakeawayourmoms-"

Charles held up a hand. "Wait, wait. I don't follow what you're saying. Something about...Akita? Slow down Toki." 

Toki winced. "...I saw Akita last night." 

"Okay?" 

"I saws hims...kissing Santas Claus." 

He peeked over at Offdensen from the corner of his eye. The man was impassive, eyes unreadable behind his glasses. 

"Is that so?" 

Toki nodded nervously, starting to chew on his nails. 

"Well, let me go talk to him."

**Author's Note:**

> This was incredibly self indulgent.


End file.
